How to Move Past Fear and Get Busy Doing What You Want to Do

fear

A couple of days ago, I wrote a post about my thoughts on the new Shonda Rhimes book,  Year of Yes.

Her book inspired me to think about the way I could take action and improve various areas of my own life.

But what was really remarkable for me was her realization that she had slowly made herself miserable by denying herself some really awesome experiences because of fear.  Fear. Even though hard work had allowed her to reach amazing and historical professional highs, fear kept her from enjoying it. Read More

How to Invite New Energy Into Your Life: A Review of Shonda Rhimes’ “A Year of Yes”

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Anybody know what it feels like to get stuck in a rut?

I certainly do. I remember a time in which I was stuck in a rut for a very long time. Years in fact. During this time, my days looked a little bit like this: Work. School. Sleep. Repeat. Work. School. Sleep. Repeat. And so on and so on.

After so many days like that my mind started to scream to break free.  I woke up one day and felt trapped and thought to myself, “How in the world did I get here?!” And I can tell you it does not feel good. Read More

You are free, so BE free!

Freedom

I recently spent a few hours in a courtroom and watched  a judge hand down a guilty verdict.

The crime committed was severe and the defendants will be going to prison for many many years.

I’ve known one of these men for years as a close family friend. So when the sentence was handed down,  I was overcome with emotion. I thought “What a waste of a life. He has so much potential.” Now he will be in prison for longer than he has been alive.

He will sit in a cold, hard prison cell  isolated from the world, which will go on without him. His 5 children will grow up and become adults, all while their father sits behind bars in a prison hundreds of miles away from them.  In prison, this full grown adult man will be told when he can eat, shower, exercise and sleep. He will be told when and if he can speak to loved ones on the outside. Read More

The Complete Guide to Having a Successful Meltdown

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Ever been somewhere where you had to sit for a long period of time– like the DMV or an airplane –and there was a toddler having a full out temper tantrum? In those situations, I always feel such empathy for the parent who has to manage the tantrum while dozens of angry and annoyed faces look on.

I recently took a 4 hour flight. I remember settling into the flight sitting across the aisle from a woman with 2 small children, both under the age of six. I watched the small family throughout the flight and mom came prepared! She had interesting little games to entertain them- toys, crayons, blocks. She had an Ipad queued up with their favorite videos and nursery rhymes. She had their favorite snacks ready. When she could tell that they were getting a little too restless, she took them both for a slow walk down the aisle and back. There was one moment where the younger of the 2 children cried, but mom was able to console her instantly and the whole incident last about 2 minutes. Read More

The End of the Road?: How to know when to walk away

This poster hangs in my home office and serves as a constant reminder that each moment in my life is precious. And because each moment is precious, I try my best to only do the things that bring satisfaction, joy, and add to the fullness of my life. To do anything less, is to sell my self short.

At some point, each one of us thinks about walking away from something. Maybe a job. A partner. A friend. Maybe even an opportunity or a way of life. And we struggle with the decision because it’s hard to know if the benefits outweigh all of the problems and frustrations that make us want to leave in the first place. And sometimes, if we are really honest with ourselves, we know that the only thing that keeps us in situations that we’ve grown tired of is the fear of change and the unknown. But the truth is that, you will have to walk away from some things eventually because if you are committed to your growth and evolution, you will undoubtedly outgrow situations and people. Things that once felt good, will no longer serve your needs in the way they used to. And sometimes we cling so tightly to the idea of something that we deny the reality of what’s right in front of us staring us in the face. Knowing when to leave is never easy, but this is what I want to you to know: Getting the life you want takes effort and attention.  You must be dedicated to making that life happen and not sit idly by or stew in frustration when things happen in your life.  In other words, no more blaming your unhappiness on bad bosses, or bad relationships, or bad friendships that go on for years and years. Instead, work on getting the friends, the partner and employment that you want. Here’s what to do when you’re not sure whether you should walk away: Read More

It is what it is…. 3 Ways to learn Total Acceptance

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I have a question for you: At this very moment, how do you feel about yourself and your life?

I bet you can list a million and one things about your life that you wish were different. Like many people you may wish that you had more money, or that you were in a meaningful relationship, or that you had a better job. You might even be wishing for a complete life overhaul because the state of things is so far away from where you imagine they should be.

A constant feeling of dissatisfaction develops when we are always focused on how we want things to be different. And sometimes this dissatisfaction grows into pain, anguish, anxiety, depression, and constant anger that we can’t ever seem to shake. Wallowing in dissatisfaction robs us of so much of our life energy. In other words, we spend so much time focused on what we think is wrong and lacking, that we can’t appreciate or even see clearly the things that are present and right. And sometimes concentrating on dissatisfaction can make problems and challenges seem bigger than what they are. Read More