What do the Lonely Do at Christmas?: 5 ways to keep your spirits up during the holiday season

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Am I the only one who loves that Emotions song, “What do the Lonely do at Christmas?”

I was listening to it earlier today and it got me to thinking, what exactly do the lonely do?

The Christmas season can pose special problems for people who spend it alone. If you are single or don’t have many friends or family, Christmas is just one of those holidays that can make you feel especially lonely and like you’re missing out. If this holiday season finds you alone and/or feeling lonely, here are 5 tips to help you get through the season: Read More

You are free, so BE free!

Freedom

I recently spent a few hours in a courtroom and watched  a judge hand down a guilty verdict.

The crime committed was severe and the defendants will be going to prison for many many years.

I’ve known one of these men for years as a close family friend. So when the sentence was handed down,  I was overcome with emotion. I thought “What a waste of a life. He has so much potential.” Now he will be in prison for longer than he has been alive.

He will sit in a cold, hard prison cell  isolated from the world, which will go on without him. His 5 children will grow up and become adults, all while their father sits behind bars in a prison hundreds of miles away from them.  In prison, this full grown adult man will be told when he can eat, shower, exercise and sleep. He will be told when and if he can speak to loved ones on the outside. Read More

The Complete Guide to Having a Successful Meltdown

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Ever been somewhere where you had to sit for a long period of time– like the DMV or an airplane –and there was a toddler having a full out temper tantrum? In those situations, I always feel such empathy for the parent who has to manage the tantrum while dozens of angry and annoyed faces look on.

I recently took a 4 hour flight. I remember settling into the flight sitting across the aisle from a woman with 2 small children, both under the age of six. I watched the small family throughout the flight and mom came prepared! She had interesting little games to entertain them- toys, crayons, blocks. She had an Ipad queued up with their favorite videos and nursery rhymes. She had their favorite snacks ready. When she could tell that they were getting a little too restless, she took them both for a slow walk down the aisle and back. There was one moment where the younger of the 2 children cried, but mom was able to console her instantly and the whole incident last about 2 minutes. Read More

What Beyonce Taught Me About Rejection

This is her performing at Stevie Wonder's tribute earlier this year. I was screaming so loud and dancing so hard, I know my neighbors thought I was crazy!
Queen Bey herself performing at Stevie Wonder’s tribute earlier this year. I was screaming so loud and dancing so hard, I know my neighbors thought I was crazy!

Sooo…. Everyone who knows me knows how much I loves me some Beyonce. Obviously she’s one of the most beautiful women in the world, and can sing her head off.  But I think I love  her so much because she’s so inspiring. I mean her work ethic is more than out of this world. I mean who can secretly record an album, secretly produce a short film for EVERY song on said album, and with no promotion or marketing release said album overnight and  then have that album debut at #1 and sell almost a million copies in 3 days? Beyonce. That’s who.  And its been amazing to watch her career and personal life evolve and grow over the past 20 years. Read More

It is what it is…. 3 Ways to learn Total Acceptance

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I have a question for you: At this very moment, how do you feel about yourself and your life?

I bet you can list a million and one things about your life that you wish were different. Like many people you may wish that you had more money, or that you were in a meaningful relationship, or that you had a better job. You might even be wishing for a complete life overhaul because the state of things is so far away from where you imagine they should be.

A constant feeling of dissatisfaction develops when we are always focused on how we want things to be different. And sometimes this dissatisfaction grows into pain, anguish, anxiety, depression, and constant anger that we can’t ever seem to shake. Wallowing in dissatisfaction robs us of so much of our life energy. In other words, we spend so much time focused on what we think is wrong and lacking, that we can’t appreciate or even see clearly the things that are present and right. And sometimes concentrating on dissatisfaction can make problems and challenges seem bigger than what they are. Read More

I HAVE THE POWERRRRRRR!!!- How to acknowledge and use your own personal power

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Does anybody else remember He-Man yelling at the top of his lungs that he had the POWERRRRR in every episode?

Or remember when this song was all over the airwaves?

Snap! – I’ve Got The Power from Sertaç Diler on Vimeo.

Well today I’d like to talk about how each of us could be a little more like He-Man and claim our personal power. But before we get started I’m going to tell you a few basic key things that I want you to know and remember:

  • You (yes you) possess a great deal of power.
  • Your power exists whether you acknowledge it or not.
  • You have the ability to harness and use your power.
  • You can use your power to create the type of life you imagine for yourself.
  • You can use your power to improve the overall quality of your life.
  • The way you use your power has an impact on others.

Well what exactly is power? Power is the ability to make things happen. Power is using your life energy to create things and experiences. Power is realizing your authority over your own life. Read More

The Nitty Grit(ty): How to Persevere

ALI KNOCKOUT

 

Failure is not falling down, but refusing to get up— Chinese Proverb

What is Grit? No, not grits, silly. Grit.

Grit is the ability to persevere when things don’t seem to be going your way.  It’s being able to keep showing up in spite of difficulties while in pursuit of your goal.

Picture this. It’s 1974 in Zaire, central Africa.  The “Rumble in the Jungle” has been hyped and touted as the biggest match of the century and the whole world is watching. A young Muhammad Ali is backed against a rope and being pummeled by a bigger and stronger George Foreman, the reigning heavyweight champion. But after 8 rounds of intense boxing and countless punches to the body, Ali somehow ends up towering over a knocked out Foreman in defiant victory. Ali perseveres and wins. This is grit. Being able to endure in the face of what feels like insurmountable challenges and obstacles. Read More

Good Grief: 5 Ways To Feel Better After a Loved One Passes Away

Good Grief

My mom’s sudden and unexpected death hit me like a brick to the face. And being someone who helps people deal with grief and overwhelming painful emotions for a living did not make my grief any more bearable. I was distraught. I felt bewildered and betrayed.  And I felt all alone. How could this happen? How was I going to deal with all this grief?

After hanging up the phone with my equally distraught sister on that fateful Monday morning in July, so many thoughts ran through my mind ….
“No, this just can’t be possible, she’s much too young to die,”
“I never showed her just how much I loved her,”
“No! She won’t get to see me finish my PhD” Read More