How to Face Reality (Even When You Don’t Really Want To)

How To Face Reality

Sometimes life is scary. And we don’t want to face reality.

Maybe it’s your finances, or your health, your relationships, your children, or your financial situation. Maybe it’s all of these things wrapped up into one great big ole overwhelming package.

So what do we tend to do?

Avoid and ignore it. We don’t go to the doctor or balance our check books. Allow ourselves to stay in relationships even when we know we shouldn’t. We won’t face our emotional issues even as we self-sabotage. Read More

Why I Became a Therapist Part 2: Rebuilding Myself

whytherapist2(1)

In Part 1, I shared  how I was far away from home and felt really alone during my first semester at college. There were thousands of young people around me yet I felt isolated and ignored.  I was very confused and my whole world was turned upside down.

After many many days of feeling really really bad,  I decided that I just could not go on that way. Something had to change.

So I took all the courage I could  muster and went to see a student health counselor.

A therapist.

Now perhaps you, like me, grew up in a community in which people did not see therapists. And if they did, they certainly didn’t talk about it.  Seeing a counselor or therapist was essentially an admission that you were crazy or even worse weak. Read More

Do You Suffer From “Happiness Destination Syndrome”?

Happiness Destination Syndrome

OK. So before we begin, as a licensed therapist I must tell you that there is technically no such thing as “Happiness Destination Syndrome” or HDS.  It is not listed in any diagnostic manual. I made it up to describe a pattern of behaviors and thought patterns that is pretty common among many many people.

And as a person recovering from HDS, I can tell you that it is very real and its symptoms are profound. Here are some examples of statements that usually come from people plagued by HDS: Read More

Why I Became a Therapist Part 1: My Personal Self-Love Journey

After I have worked with a client for awhile, I usually get asked one question sooner or later: Have you always had such a positive disposition?

The answer to that question is a resounding NO!

I developed coping skills to deal with life’s challenges as I became an adult. Coping mechanisms that I still use to this day.

In this series of posts, I will share the life experiences that forced me to develop these skills and how I went about building them for myself.

Here’s the first part of my story: Read More

How to Move Past Fear and Get Busy Doing What You Want to Do

fear

A couple of days ago, I wrote a post about my thoughts on the new Shonda Rhimes book,  Year of Yes.

Her book inspired me to think about the way I could take action and improve various areas of my own life.

But what was really remarkable for me was her realization that she had slowly made herself miserable by denying herself some really awesome experiences because of fear.  Fear. Even though hard work had allowed her to reach amazing and historical professional highs, fear kept her from enjoying it. Read More

How to Invite New Energy Into Your Life: A Review of Shonda Rhimes’ “A Year of Yes”

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Anybody know what it feels like to get stuck in a rut?

I certainly do. I remember a time in which I was stuck in a rut for a very long time. Years in fact. During this time, my days looked a little bit like this: Work. School. Sleep. Repeat. Work. School. Sleep. Repeat. And so on and so on.

After so many days like that my mind started to scream to break free.  I woke up one day and felt trapped and thought to myself, “How in the world did I get here?!” And I can tell you it does not feel good. Read More